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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24930667">I Hate You (But Not Really)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jasper_Ghost/pseuds/Jasper_Ghost'>Jasper_Ghost</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Outsiders - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, M/M, but still, it's not bad, trigger warning, trigger warning for eating disorders just in case</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 06:20:01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,465</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24930667</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jasper_Ghost/pseuds/Jasper_Ghost</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Two-Bit and Darry have been fighting over Darry's health, and it takes a toll on their relationship.</p><p>(Birthday gift for Sunny-Gnelf on Tumblr)</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Darrel Curtis/Two-Bit Mathews</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>32</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>I Hate You (But Not Really)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/memory_bees/gifts">memory_bees</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Slight trigger warning for eating disorders. It's not heavily described, but I'm being safe and adding it just in case!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Tears glistened in both of their eyes, threatening to fall and release into hot streams of anger down their cheeks, down their chins, and dripping down to the floorboards. The redhead’s face was as red as his hair, features scrunched up in attempt to hold back frustrated shouts. The man across from him was much the opposite, stone, mouth curled into a taut frown, yet his lower lip still quivered. Sad blue eyes broke the unannounced staring contest, looking at the wall, and he took in a shuddering breath in through his nose.</p><p> </p><p>“You should leave, Keith,” he said, voice so soft and hesitant, not wanting his boyfriend to leave. Yet, it seemed like the best option for them. They were fighting more and more over his health, how he was filling his stomach with coffee to keep himself going every day, working on mere liquids just to get a paycheck and stay up long enough to make whoever was home supper, but he’d stay up longer with his thoughts haunting him. He barely was able to spend time with Two-Bit, or even his family, and he got to see them every day of the week. </p><p> </p><p>A sharp huff came from Two-Bit, and he finally felt his tears fall. They felt like they were melting his skin, dripping down his cheeks and chin. His nails were pressed deep into his palms, hands clenched into shaking, tight fists. “Guess I will,” he replied in a low voice, grumbling and strained to keep back from continuing their argument, wanting to get his concerns through the other’s skull, let them ring around in there, get him to understand. His eyes remained on Darry for an extra moment, maybe three. He didn’t want to leave either. He just wanted to lay under the warm covers of Darry’s bed, his boyfriend’s head on his chest, just murmuring words of affection to each other until the sun was gone and the stars sparkled outside the blinds, then they’d cuddle, sleeping until Darry had to get up for work the next morning.</p><p> </p><p>An apology came from Darry as Two-Bit turned to leave the house, but it fell on deaf ears. The distancing creaks of his footsteps made his heart race faster and faster, anxiety closing his throat like he was having an allergic reaction. He moved to peek out of his bedroom door, and he found that Two-Bit had stopped, his teary eyes staring back at him. Those sparkling gray orbs widened, not having expected for the other to peer out at him. He felt anger suddenly shoot through him, and he rose up his fist, middle finger pointed high at the brunet, clearly expressing his emotions. He hated him, or, well, his decisions. He was no better than him, though, and he knew that, yet that didn’t ease his anger. He couldn’t see the other’s expression past the blurry wall in front of his sight, he just turned and hurried out of the house, his junky car roaring down the street in mere seconds.</p><p> </p><p>That’s finally when a sob left Darry’s lips, a tear sliding down his cheek.</p><p> </p><p>He was right, everything he said. He shouldn’t be a zombie, wasting away like that. He wasn’t truly living-- he was dying. He felt awful most days, coffee temporarily removing the sickness, keeping him going, getting him through the day until supper, where he was too drained to eat much. He had chores to do. There was little time left in the day after work.</p><p> </p><p>It was wrong.</p><p> </p><p>He really never did spend time with Two-Bit anymore. He was a ghost in his house, only captured in the halls or briefly in the kitchen. He was only interacting with his brothers if Ponyboy needed something signed for school, or if Sodapop needed the keys to the truck for work.</p><p> </p><p>Tears continued to drip down from his dulling eyes like a shower, neverending for hours. His whole face was flushed, and his eyes were bloodshot. He imagined how Two-Bit must’ve looked right now, tear-streaked cheeks, eyelids drooping with the fatigue of sobbing out his lungs. He was probably curled up with one of the stuffed animals he bought him; he always did like to cuddle with those, even if he hated to admit it. He wanted to kiss his forehead, kiss away any remaining tears on his cheeks. His face wasn’t made to look sad.</p><p> </p><p>He was sorry.</p><p> </p><p>Darry sat up from his recliner finally, having made up his mind on what he should do, chewing anxiously at his abused lower lip, feeling the tingling sting of the ripped up skin. A sigh came from his lips, and he tugged on his beat-up sneakers and a loose jacket to fight off the chilling air of the evening that seemed suspiciously fitting for the day. He stepped out of the house and began walking to his boyfriend’s house, eyes hidden by looking down at the cracked and uneven sidewalk beneath his feet. Sodapop had the truck for work, leaving him with a much longer route with his swirling thoughts.</p><p> </p><p>He was halfway to Two-Bit’s house when he heard the familiar rumble of a car. His attention was immediately captured, and his head snapped up to see the dirty dumpster heap of a car coming down the street. He felt his breath freeze in his throat as he saw it slow in front of him, Two-Bit’s wide eyes clear behind the windshield. Before he knew it, his feet were dragging him to the car as it parked near the curb. His arms tightly embraced Two-Bit once he stepped out from the driver’s seat, squeezing him against his chest like he was going run away again. Two-Bit melted into the hug, arms just as tight around Darry, hands clutching the back of the jacket. Apologies came from both of them, repeatedly, assurances murmured in between. They didn’t care if they were seen by any of the houses on the block being as close as they were.</p><p> </p><p>“I should’ve listened,” Darry muttered into Two-Bit’s hair, but he immediately shook his head.</p><p> </p><p>“I shouldn’t have flipped you off or said any of that stuff.”</p><p> </p><p>“I deserved it.”</p><p> </p><p>“No, ya didn’t,” Two-Bit whispered, looking up at Darry with big eyes. “Don’t say that, baby.” He leaned up and lightly pressed his lips to his cheek. Darry merely nodded along, arms becoming all the more tight around him. He felt his eyes tingle with familiar warmth, vision blurred with tears returning to sparkle in his eyes. He sniffled, and he buried his face further into the greased fluff of his boyfriend’s hair.</p><p> </p><p>“You wanna head back to your place?” Two-Bit asked in a hesitant voice, hands clutching loosely to the back of Darry’s shirt, not wanting to leave the embrace they were in despite them being out in the open, anyone able to see them if they took a quick glance out their kitchen window. Darry shook his head.</p><p> </p><p>“Could we go to yours instead?” he requested, gently pulling back from the hug, staring down at his boyfriend, rubbing the tears from his eyes, “just sit around for the rest of the day, eat mac ‘n cheese?” </p><p> </p><p>Two-Bit mouth went agape, then his lips pulled into a wide, ear to ear smile, dimples showing in his cheeks. He reached up and placed his hands on either side of Darry’s face, and he leaned up to press his lips all over his cheeks, causing a small laugh to come from the other man. “I thought you’d never ask,” he hummed against his skin. </p><p> </p><p>Darry leaned away from Two-Bit’s lips, grinning just as wide as him. “You think you can drive me there, darlin’? I don’t got the truck today.” Two-Bit nodded and removed himself from him, then reached out a hand for him to hold.</p><p> </p><p>“I promise it doesn’t smell too horrible today.”</p><p> </p><p>Another laugh came from Darry, and he took his boyfriend’s hand before being guided to the passenger door. “I’ll keep a window cracked,” he giggled as the other unlocked the door for him, opening it gracefully and expressively with a teasing bow.</p><p> </p><p>“You do every time.”</p><p> </p><p>“I know.”</p><p> </p><p>Two-Bit strolled back over to the driver’s side once he shut Darry’s door, and he sat down and started up his car with a nasty sputter of the engine-- the noise didn’t phase either of the men; it was normal for the car. The two shared one more kiss, their lips soft and warm against each other, showing how much they had missed each other in the few hours they were separated. Two-Bit pulled away with a smile, and he placed his hands on the steering wheel and did a quick u-turn before driving back towards his house, the air calm.</p>
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